OH YEAH, SO...

i realized a while ago that i think i have a problem. i completely live vicariously through books. um, correction: i live vicariously through twilight. WTF. how ridiculous. but seriously everyy situation I'm in, it completely relates to it in some way or the other. oh and every song i listen to...yeah, do i even have to finish that sentence?? and, possibly even worse: every vocabulary unit in my english class, we have to write sentences or paragraphs using the 20 words. and every word always relates to vampires. to me at least. my teacher probably thinks I'm a freak since all of my paragraphs are completely about vampires. more specifically, twilight. haha. gahhh
example: sooo, (this relates to the below post) this guy just told me he likes me. he's two years younger than me. he's one of my best friends, although i don't think he knows that. but really, i love him to death, but I'm not in love with him. he's my Jacob Black. gah, i thought i already had one of those! i don't really know what to do, or what to say to him. why do some of my best guy friends always have to do this?! we become super close, and then he blows it by telling me that he likes me. then it's just awkward with empty conversations and me trying not to say the wrong thing. anyway, this boy...i love being with him and talking to him. i love hugging him and sitting next to his warm body. seriously? whyy did he have to go liking me? and now he always say things like..."this [romantic] movie reminds me of you." and "you're beautiful" and "goodnight, sweet dreams" OMG, puh-leaseee!!!
and now i can't get it out of my head.

and so yeah, I'm obsessed with Twilight. I've read the whole series twice. except Breaking Dawn...i just started reading it yesterday for the second time. and i keep finding these stupid Jacob Black's, but where is my Edward?? i might have an idea...it seems so perfect...but it's a long shot.